It's about to be a song. This goes out to my MacBook Pro. I love you computer! Oooo The night is young and I'm all about it, yeah Oooo it's about to be a dream come true yeah I sit down to make a song I wish it was harder than you thought it was Open GarageBand it's got everything I need now it's on But I'm gonna take the credit though Now let's get started Where should we begin Let's pick a drum beat Fill it in, fill it in Ladies and gents it's chorus time I just want you to know it I made this song with my computer Oooo bopiteedopopadoo is how I make it all up as I go along And for fun we'll add some strings and just before we're done We'll go out on an echo echo echo And when sometimes I hit a brick wall So as not to waste time I just move on Ladies and gents its chorus time I know that you now know this I made this song with my computer Now let's slow it down Thankyou computer Pushin your buttons cause you my computer yeah Thankyou computer All over your mouse pad with my two fingers yeah Thankyou computer You'll be my friend beautiful computer Beautiful computer Whoa For makin me sound Sound so natural I sound natural Oh you Ladies and gents it's chorus time I know that you still know this I made this song with my computer Let's throw it down And once again it's chorus time In this case we'll end with it Did I mention I made this with my computer Let's shut it down

Hm? Hm mm...awh man I'm... Up at dawn at the crack-a-tha butt, People in tha kuntree know wassup, outside eatin breakfast while I pluck a chicken, I'll show you how the milk gets from the cow to the kitchen The rest of my day spent out of doors, I got to with 18 hours of chores But you know we gotta fit in some kuntree lovin', So from midnight to 1, we go kuntree klubbin' We put the ugh in kuntree klubbin' We put the ugh in kuntree kuntree By the time most of you start thinkin bout coffee, On my hands I've had chicken eggs, ass and droppins Wiiipe a cows ass up with my sleeve, Im doin things you would never ever believe Now I don't think cow tippins very funny, But we're in a recession so I'd do it for the money Cause I gotta make sure my friends & family aight, And with my money at the klub, my kuntry britches aight?! Of course! We put the ugh in kuntree klubbin' We put the ugh in kuntree kuntree Watch out! Watch out! Don't leave us nasty kuntree folks out! We'll take a shout in yer mouth that'll go Pow, Kapow And no doubt it'll forever change the sound of ya vowels Whaoaow That's right, and my naked hairy body is quite a sight Mmm Oo la la Come and get you some, Lickity long lips here she comes! We put the ugh in kuntree klubbin' We put the ugh in kuntree kuntree We put the ugh in kuntree klubbin' We put the ugh in kuntree kuntree There's no waiting in line, at the chicken pen, you just come right in, It's time to feast your eyes on granny smith thighs, it's plucking time Cluck cluck cluck is all they say, Ax em how many eggs did they lay? 12345 I lost count! Man, come on chicken lover it's time to bounce! There's no tariff to pay for a romp in the hay, Be sure to close the gate. It's just a game we play. It's alright, it's okay, it's alright. Oh girl you make me wanna go down town buy a pound of liquid shuga, and pour it all over ya, shuga, wouldja? Come on baby girl I wanna dunk that doughnut. As long as nobody knows, I wanna dunk that doughnut. As long as nobody knows, Lemme rip that doughnut As long as nobody knows, That chicken doughnut, Lemme rip that chicken bisquit doughnut.

Excuse me can I get through? Excuse me crowd, hello, is this the way to the magician show? Surprise I am the magician I snuck in to successfuly divert your attention My ploy's I'm a magician now before I start my next magical trick I need to mention I need a participant Someone from the audience Girl planted in the red dress there Come make your way on up the stairs Let me make one thing clear Have we ever met my dear No. Look at this rabbit now it's flowers Wanna see the rest of my magical powers Allow me to spin you around Now it's my turn to flit around 78% of my magick show is the two of us dancing around He creates a mood that is romantical Up his sleeves he's got hidden botanicals Mmm flowers Oh, I swear he was just right here how the he'll did he get over there? Notice I wear a glove, and can produce a dove while making love? Now I hypnotize you using misdirection, Pull up your shirt, show off your middle section Pick a card, any card Why not pick my business card Im a master of black magic and dark conjuring, i also do childrens parties and balloon animals. Don't stray too far or you'll float away I like magic and tricking you Watch me do a magic trick Did I trick you? Pull you close and with a touch of slight of hand I snap your bra from its elastic band I see you wore red for tonights event Same color as my blood that's rushin in How bout afterwards we get a little privacy though Unless you're ready to go we can make it part of the show Part of the show (3x) We can make makin love part of the show Discreetly take your panties off I got you under my mind control Go ahead and loosen up that top Flash the crowd now straight up lose control Whoa police it aint my fault She flashed the crowd and took her panties off Attention everyone, stop and check the floor This girl has lost her mind she took her panties off Officer something don't make sense I know that girl she is normal She must be under mind control Mind control mind control

You wanna tell me something but your mouth is full of food You start explaining while crumbs are crumbling all over you Yer kinda makin me sick I throw up in the back of my throat I try to walk away fast, but you grab my arm, not letting go Now I'm givin you more attention than you deserve I can't believe I can't understand a word you're sayin girl Sloppiness all around your neck greasy neck you keep going on and on Hold up, wait up a minute you for real answering your phone? It's fun to be rude, uh oh She showed me something that I had not thought about before Like pickin pockets and pushin people with no remorse I'm thinkin bout not holdin doors for ladies like I know I should Dressin up scary and scarin kids in my neighborhood I just had a thought next time that I'm in my car I'm gonna cut you off then do a bad parallel parking job Whether you're ready or not 1, 2, 3, 10 here I come Excuse me while I interupt It's fun to be rude Here I come walkin in the room, shushing you, shush shush shush I'm tellin everybody in the room they need to listen up they need to hush Don't mind if I do stick my finger in your food cause it's rude Hey everybody can I make a noucement?, y'all are dumb! Here I come poppin balloons, pop pop, poppin y'alls party balloons I can foresee this ugly party eh eh eh eh ending soon Lemme just right quick make a mess Pushin things around makin a mess Oops I took y'alls keys off y'alls keyrings

Ahhh Here he comes yo it's CrapeMurda Probaly a name you never heard of He can take a ball of Xmas lights Man, twink a tree make it look twice as nice He gets botanical with it, makes garden parties explicit, grab ya cocktail and sip it, cause its about to get, it's about to get what? Its about to get All Lit Up!! Don't stay awake tonight, it's scary oo, We'll take you by surprise Don't stay awake, ooo just say goodnight TripleXXXmas comes but 3 months a year, Specially when you're stringing up the lights out here! Mika in the treetops up in the air, Chadwick on his knees, twinkin' a deer. There she goes, uh oh, you know what that means? Ya line just got blown You need to get a 20 amp circuit inserted, So we can get this Christmas party started We pimpin lights outside til 2010 yeah We pimpin til then While your electric bills go higher Cause in January we start rippin it out Hold up yo ya gettin aheada yaself, Shove those thoughts back up on the shelf, It's a freelance job, Don't take it personal, We need to stretch these hours out Cause this is seasonal Ooo we sneak up on your property when you ain't home, And we don't leave til the trees is all glowin', So when you roll up There she goes! (gasp) You see the decorations And your mind is blown! Tryina get som' started and you wanna get down, We talkin business ain't in need of no clown, If you callin jasmine then you're gettin manny no doubt, Cause you know the double team that everybody's all about! Y'all need to back up a second While I keep on decoratin Take this tree to twink city It's goin be nasty but pretty Take a ball of lights and Roll em up then you roll back down Move ya ladder then ya Climb on up then you come back down Well alright now boys I just wanna tell ya We got G-Bo holdin down the flo, Directions for anywhere you wanna go, Dave runnin power where he wanna, Tree on the scaff gettin high as huh uh Shhhhh Ahhhhh

Keep seein you across the room, Avoiding my eye contact, I take it as a challenge, And start my advancement toward you I go around a bunch of folks, As you try sneaking by, Bump into you, knock you down, Help you up, now who's your savior? If you're gonna suck, succeed succeed tonight If you're gonna suck, succeed succeed tonight Who's your savior? I see you by the bathrooms, I wanna come over and knock you down, I've already succeeded there, So I walk over with drinks in hand. Im already thinking about this party, I wanna get started with me and you, You take my drinks, hand one to ya friend, Then you both disappear in the bathroom. (2X's) If you're gonna suck, succeed succeed tonight. If you're gonna suck, succeed succeed tonight. Who's your savior? Ooo I hope we bleep tonight Just like makin a homemade apple pie Only takes you and I, and her We'll be fine, I hope we bleep tonight Alt. I hope you find the right Guy tonight, with your human eyes Just like apple pie, baked just right Cream of some young guy I hope that you can't go to sleep Cause I'm standin outside your house in the street And I'm peekin in ya window watching you can't sleep And I'm wondering if you want to watch some tv with me in the street. I stole a tv just for you and hooked it up in your front yard I wanna scream at the top of my lungs For you to change the blasted channel You must be lucky to have me here You don't even have to thank me I want you to scream at the top of your lungs, when I ask you Who's your savior? I hold my Polaroid up high A picture that I took when you weren't looking In the pocket with a hole so it's next to my thigh Its the reason that I'm dancing crooked I apologize if it's too much for your eyes Makin sexy body movements is all I know Your music makes me wanna slow down, lose control Lose control!

Good morning this morning, could everyone please find a desk pew this morning and take your seats. Before we begin I would like to introduce to you our musical entertainment and newest member of the church of Scientology Thankyou everyone we're so glad to be here! This place already feels like home. It looks just like the mega churches I've seen in the south, only alot smarter. As new students of Scientology I'm sure you're aware of the many questions they might have, so we've created a song for all of those who may want to learn more about Scientology. This is exactly how it goes... S-C-I-E-N-T-O-L-O-G But most importantly Y I signed up for this show better known as S-C-I-E-N-T-O-L-O-G But mostly importantly why? I got so much to learn, I mean read Yeah I know it There's so many different ways I can grow A bullshit garden in the front of my yard And I know it sounds kinda crazy but I got a plaque cause I made it this far And I know I'm gonna shoot right through the OT levels just so ling as they keep makin more And I'm probly gonna be in next months bi-weekly newsletter if I'm interbulating correctly Hmm I'm not completely sold on it. But You haven't even met your auditor yet, who you'll tell all your secrets to. But don't worry, we'll write them down so no one will ever know about it. Here, sign this billion year contract! Some things they frown upon would be lack of money, the use of critical thinking or common sensory And don't you try to leave cause we'll find you, we'll track you down and maybe kill you, just kidding, but seriously... Now L Ron Hubbard may be a joke to pharmasudical companies, but nobody else can better teach you how to grow and tend to a Bullshit garden in the front of my yard And I know it sounds kinda crazy but I got a plaque cause I made it this far And I know I'm gonna shoot right through the OT levels just so ling as they keep makin more And I'm probly gonna be in next months bi-weekly newsletter if I'm interbulating correctly

El Espanol cantante oh esta sorprendiendo tan. Una de las mejores invenciones del mundo. singing spanish is oh so amazing! one of the best inventions in the world! Es uno de esos lenguajes que usted puede tomar con usted dondequiera, sober todo Espana. It's one of those languages you can take with you anywhere, mostly Spain. Me encanta diciendo colores, Amarillo! Me gusta contar demasiado, Por ejemplo, Cinco, quatro, tres, dos, uno I love saying colors. Yellow! I love counting too. For example, 5 4 3 2 1 Tal vez algun dia me ire a vivir en algun lugar mas cubano! (trasladarse a Cuba) Maybe one day i'll move somewhere more Cuban. (Move to Cuba) Nunca dormir con este nuevo lenguaje que estoy escupiendo. Me gusta el naranja y azul. Mis numeros favoritos son veinte nueve, y tambien siete y ocho. I never sleep, with this new language i'm spittin'. I like orange and blue. My favorite numbers are 29 and also 7 and 8. Cuba es maravillosa! Es tan nada malo que pasa. Tambien es donde las computadoras vienen. No puedo haver estas cosas arriba. Cuba is wonderful! I hear nothing bad ever happens there. It's also where computers come from. I can't just make this stuff up.

Aight folks, glad y'all could join us today here at the county fair! Wanna thank Celisa for lettin use her property today and make sure you check out her colorful jewelry booth across from the face painting, the one next to the porta-johns. Gotta stop this drankin so I Put away my whiskey cause I'm Not comin home until I Can show you my better side. But next thing I know I'm in my truck And I'm drinking and drivin "WellI sure hope he don't hit nobody" "Now I'm sure everybody's just fine." Well he was goin too fast, And he t-boned a mini- van, They went off of a cliff and Both exploded so you see It can happen to regular folks Just like you and me! "Now I thought you told me nobody got hurt" " now come on Dolly, you know the song!" " Ha ha ha you got me there!" Well I reckon I'm'ull need, To figure out this whole ghost thing, And just what'll happen to my family, How could this have happened to my drunk ass?!?! "I can be pretty careless at times" "Ive done it too babydoll" As it turns out my actions do have consequences, I'm not ready for this afterlife after all. I know that ima sinner but I've mended all my fences, So I'm wondering why I haven't heard my saviors call. There must be sumthin awful wrong. "Well bless yer heart darlin'" "Well thanyou very much" "And how bout you take us out with them beautiful singin pipes" "Well alrighty" Oooooooooooooooooo "Well she does sound like a ghost" "bye bye" "bye bye folks"